I'm Still Here...

I'm still here....I haven't forgotten about this little blog of mine...I guess all the times that I should have been writing I just kept it inside and didn't use this as the outlet I probably needed. Oh well, I am writing today - hopefully I pick up the habit again because these guest appearances aren't as fun.

It's weird to think that I should be on my way back to Boston today. I didn't even think of it until I woke up this morning and realized it was the second...hopefully somebody else needed my seat more than I did and was happy to take it off my hands.

Instead, I will be going home in two weeks for two weeks. People keep asking me if I am excited to go home...but I guess I don't really know the answer to that question. I am excited to be in my house filled with food and snacks...I am excited to see my family and my friends...but I guess I am not looking forward to being asked a million questions about my time here. I think that means that I am hiding from something...I suppose I feel like I have not accomplished much and am embarassed that I really don't know a lot of the answers to the questions they will be asking.

I don't know how long I will be here. I haven't found other work. I haven't met an Italian to marry. I don't know what I want to make of all of this. I just don't know...and I just want that to be OK that I just don't know right now...but I am scared that I will be judged. Maybe I am scared that I will be judged by others because I am judging myself.

I am facing the possibility that I will not be allowed back into the country...and to be honest with you, I would regret not doing more with my time here. However, what is to happen is not in my hands at this point in time. All I can hope for is that I can fly under the radar and really come back kicking some Gianna in Italy butt when I get back here.

Maybe I need to go home to realize how lucky I am. I think this first round of time here was a major learning experience and getting used to the lifestyle - not as a student. Maybe even realizing I am not a student. Who knows...either way, I do have some goals for my future time here...not just jobwise, but experience and me-wise...I don't really feel like explaining what I mean by all of that but something is in the works and I can feel it.

I can't wait to go home and reimage my computer. This thing is driving me insane! I'm ready to throw it out the window...rarrrr...it just keeps stopping and starting again for no reason...kicking me off the internet...not all of my functions are working anymore...it's more stressful than anything! Then again, if my computer is my only stress in life right now - is life really that bad?

This sucks...all the cool friends that I've made are leaving within the next week to go back to the States...back to their normal lives. I'm most sad to see Sammy and Josh go. They are both super cool people and I hope to keep in touch with them.

It also kinda sucks that Georgette is gone for a whole month...oh well, it will be broken up nicely because I will be home two of the weeks that she is gone anyway. And we'll be back just in time for New Year's!!!!!!!!! Yay!!!!!

Other happy news...the girls and I are going to NYC for the weekend!! I'm so pumped!! I haven't visited Alyssa in all this time...and the fact that we're ALL going is going to be so awesome. Yay!! It's nice to have something super exciting to look forward to. I've never partied in NYC before so I'm going to admit that I'm a little bit nervous...I'm going to need 5 hour energy drinks like crazy especially with the jet lag.

OK - now I'm just rambling random stuff...to be continued.

A dopo :)

We Are So Posh....

Nothing like an awesome night out with the girls! Wait, back up - nothing like an awesome DAY and NIGHT with the girls.

Georgette and I started the day off right by hitting up Il Porcospino by San Lorenzo to get some grub. As always, a little lunch date turned into a three hour chat fest...and of course, some vino took part in our fabulous lunch. She got to meet Albert...and I was happy to see him too because I have been chasing him down trying to hang out forever. It's always nice to get a free 1/2 litre of wine - good to have friends at restaurants :)

I saw Franco while we were there which was great. Albert must have told him that I was there so he came out and said hi to Georgette and I and talked to us for a few minutes. How nice! I'm pretty sure he didn't remember who I was (I mean, give the guy a break it was 3 years ago)...but it was a very nice gesture of him to visit our table.

Needless to say, we're going back...but maybe a little less vino next time because that totally killed our tab!!!!

After a nice little nappy at home, I went back out and met up with Georgette and a few other lovely ladies for what was to become the perfect evening. We started out with some drinks and fun conversation and then made our way over to The Cavalli Club at Piazza del Carmine. I really wasn't sure what to expect with the name and all...but there was no cover charge and it ended up being really cool inside and we danced our butts off for like two hours or something.

I'm not going to lie...being in a club where everyone was dressed so nice...and oh yeah, ROBERTO CAVALLI was there...made us feel pretty baller and posh!! We are totally going back :)

Now, I just have to figure out my Boston trip and we're all good....happy happy happy!!

A dopo

...non lo so...

I woke up this morning with mad anxiety in my chest. It's just like, something is really bothering me and I have no idea what it is even though I've been searching my brain all morning for possible reaons...I can't seem to shake the feeling at the moment. It paralyzes me and makes me not want to do anything or ever leave my bed...which is probably the opposite of what I should do. Oh well...



Maybe it's not anxiety...maybe my body is hating me for eating a ham and cheese quesadilla followed by a kebab at 2:30 am...ew, that's never a settling feeling when you know you've eaten like a pig the night before! Gross!!



I've become friends with these two really awesome girls...it was nice being able to go out and have people to talk to about real shit for once. That's been one thing that's rare here - there's a lot of people around and definitely people to call but not a lot of people to like REALLY talk to. I'm sad because one of the girls is just here for the semester so she leaves in December...but the other girl is here for 6 more months I believe? So, it's nice to know our friendship can continue on and grow!



I'm beginning to look into tickets to come home for the holidays. It's a weird feeling actually...I'm really excited but I'm a little bit nervous at the same time. Even though I've kept in touch with everyone it will feel like a dream when I can see them all again...and then leave again and won't be back for so long...I wonder how I will feel about home once I'm there. I'm more interested to see how I will feel about Italy when I'm in Boston...I hope I have positive feelings towards both.



In a way, my time here this "semester" has been a very big learning experience. I'm seeing the culture in a much different light than I was able to when I was studying abroad. I'm viewing the city with a completely different perspective than I did three years ago...not necessarily in a good or bad way, just totally different. So, this was my learning experience and next "semester" will be much better I think...I'm looking forward to it!!



I need to LIVE more while I'm here...I'm not taking enough of advantage of the fact that I'm in ITALY....maybe I will go on a day trip this weekend with someone. Or check out a museum. Or get dressed up and go to a delicious dinner at a restaurant. It's like, why the hell not? I came here to LIVE and I feel like I'm not doing enough of that...so YA, moving forward...that's what it's all about. Letting go a little bit more enjoying life :)

Ahhhhhhh, I feel so much better now!!!!

A dopo :)

I'm Alive...

Yay! I'm alive! So, I was not ignoring my blog...I simply had swine flu (according to the doctor, but I'm not really sure if that was a true diagnosis or not) and was sick in bed for a week. Anyway, I am completely back to normal health now - hallelujah!!

Let's see here...the doctor was an interesting experience for me. All five of us were sick in the house so last Tuesday they called the doctor to come do a house visit (because that is normal here). Twenty minutes later, the doctor shows up and we all went into the living room and with no privacy at all had our check-ups one at a time with him. He checked our hearts, ears and throats. After looking at us, he said that we had the swine flu and needed to rest for the rest of the week and drink lots of water, orange juice, etc...he is saying this as he is putting a cigarette in his mouth and his motor scooter helmet back on!!

Clearly, being stuck in the house for a week with four other sick people wasn't an ideal situation...but I guess it was nice to do nothing for a week except for eat and sleep. It was funny though because all I wanted to eat was chicken soup and normal things one would eat when sick - but we still ate legit meals.

Anyway, I know this was a totally lame post but it's 11 now and I am starting to think bed sounds like a really awesome idea. I'll have to be on my blogging game this week and really make up for the week I lost :)

A dopo!

The Diaper Story

So, I did it. I changed a dirty diaper. It was disgusting - no doubt about it. But somehow, it ended up being an experience I will remember.



I don't know how it is even possible, but the 18 month old takes the most horrific smelling "caca's" ever known to mankind. You can literally smell it across from the room. If you're feeling grossed out right now - imagine how I feel having to deal with this on a daily basis.



The part that makes it somewhat forgivable is that he knows and announces it: "Ho fatto una caca! Pulzo!!" (I'm sure you can translate the first part...Pulzo = SMELLY) And he says it with that cute little face of his which makes you want to pick him up and squeeze him in spite of him being a litlte pulzo.



I had not changed his diaper yet up until yesterday. But, as I have been here longer and longer I knew the day would soon arrive. The past few times I tried asking him if he would let me try to change it but he always replied with the shake of a head and saying "Mamma".



Well, yesterday was that fateful day when he said SI! It was gross. Obviously changing a baby's poopy diaper is gross...but what made this 10x grosser was the fact that we don't have baby wipes in the house and I had to use MY HAND and WATER. Alright, so I'm exaggerating a little bit and it wasn't as horrible as I had imagined - but it wasn't super fun either.



Once the worst part was over, I had him laying down on his little changing area and I was putting his fresh diaper on followed by pants. Because I was standing over him in such a way, his face lightened up and his hands went straight down my shirt and he got a full on squeeze. To make the situation even better, he looked up at me and said "bella!!"

Honestly, I didn't know what to do...so I just nicely got his hands out of my business and pretended like nothing ever happened.

And that, is the diaper story.

Bagel With Cream Cheese and American Coffee = New State Of Mind

All I can really say right now is YUM! I just had a delicious breakfast with Georgette at the American Diner by Santa Croce. I have heard about it for 3 years now but I finally went and it was awesome!! It's amazing how far a little taste of home can go...a bagel with cream cheese and American coffee.


The weather here is gorgeous today - the perfect kind of day to sit outside and chat it up for a few hours. So, we did just that! Which you know what?! That's pretty cool to say considering most people are back home sitting inside in a cubicle at a desk working instead of LIVING LIFE.


And thinking about that has brought me to a new state of mind.


Yes, it is important for me to find a job and to make money (even if it's a small amount). But, I think that the best way for this to happen is to stop worrying so much and to start LIVING LIFE. Go out. Meet people. Enjoy the beautiful city that is currently my home. Get the word out that I'm looking. Of course try to find things as well...but not stress so much about it. This is something that is going to take some time - so I might as well enjoy the time.


I feel much better about everything. I know something is going to come along...and I know I am going to meet more and more great people along my way during this chapter of my life.


So here's to making this adventure MORE of an adventure and enjoying this experience 10x more than I have been!!


And my advice for anyone looking to gain a fresh new perspective on your life...go out and grab yourself a fresh bagel and some coffee. Have a great conversation with a friend covering 20 topics at once...you'll feel brand new and ready to tackle anything.

Daylight Savings Already? Ew...

We had Daylight Savings yesterday in Italy...gross! Today felt SO short. It was already getting much darker earlier in the day but it seemed like it was nighttime two hours earlier than normal today. Oh well...the weird part is the States doesn't "fall back" until next Sunday. So for the next week we are only 5 hours apart instead of 6...kinda cool, I guess.



So, I may or not have dropped about 300 bucks yesterday. But it was for a good cause. ME!! I never spent any of my birthday money or the money that we got back from our security deposit...so I mean, I don't really feel too guilty about it. Also, I bought a lot for what I spent and it's all things that I'll get a lot of use out of for a long time...so what did I get??

• Ray Ban aviators


• 2 pairs of boots (one gray pair that only come up to my ankles; one black pair that are high cut)


• 2 scarves


• 1 poncho style jacket

After I went on my mad shopping spree, I checked out the Duomo because it was the first day that it became a pedestrian only zone. It was actually really cool! It was a gorgeous day so everyone was out celebrating the fact that no more cars, busses and bikes are allowed in the Piazza and the streets surrounding it. There were people in the streets and it seemed like the entire city was swarmed around the Duomo and the Baptistry. Now I can say I took a little part of Florence's history!!

I guess today was pretty standard...nothing too exciting has really happened in the past few days.

Federico was home from school (sick) so I hung out with him and Nonna Mima for awhile this morning. I went to recharge my phone at the place I always go to on Via Massaccio. Really, there are so many other places that I could go - but I go there because the guy that works there (Lorenzo) is absolutely gorgeous. He remembered that the company I use is WIND and that I usually put 10 Euro worth of credit today...so I felt pretty special. I went in there feeling pretty confident becaues I was rocking my aviators, scarf and black boots and I was going to ask him if he knew of anyone that might need some help. Well, even after I bought a Coca-Cola for the sole purpose of having a reason to stay for a bit and bring up the topic of me looking for work...I couldn't build up the courage and ended up leaving after 10 minutes. Haha, really, Gianna?! Oh well - maybe next time!!

Other than that...the boys were pretty good today. My heart breaks everytime Riccardo cries and says "Mamma! Mamma!" with his sweet little voice. Luckily it's been getting easier and easier to calm him down after just a few minutes and find ways to distract him. He is so adorable and I can't get enough of his little face when he's happy.

As for Federico, I finally realized that he only says super mean things to me when his parents or grandparents are around...what a little show-off! Him and I were like attached at the hip, best friends today. Everything we did, he wanted to do together. He even wanted me to read a bunch of books to him (yes, I can read in Italian!!) and he was all snugged up on me and holding my hand. Then at dinner he was telling me how stupid I am and that I'm evil...it's like whoa whoa whoa! Did we not just have an awesome together, Mr. 4-year old?! So when he left the table I told his parents and they just laughed and said that they know that's what he does...so as long as we're all on the same page I'm not worried about it!!

Well...tomorrow is supposed to be more eventful...I'm meeting up for some American coffee. Maybe while I am out I will stop by a few random places and ask for work! And I hope to go out tomorrow night so...hopefully more interesting stories to come.

A dopo :)